Melchester Rovers' star midfielder, the Brazilian Carlos Cashinio, is threatening to return home to be with his family. Speaking through his agent he is reported to have said " The weather is awful, the food is inedible, my team-mates are morons and local women are like dogs. I also miss my family".
Melchester manager, Brian "Nobby" Williams told fans at a forum last night, "Carlos is suspended for the next ten games (for head-butting the Granchester City mascot last week) but we will fight to keep him at the club".
Latest result:
Sarsons Vinegar Div 3 (East): Melchester Rovers 0: GranchesterCity 6
Thursday, 16 December 2010
Pensioners attacked in car.
Stowmarket businessman Chaz Windsor and his female companion recently described the unfortunate incident.
Speaking exclusively to The Stowmarket Bugle, Chaz (64), still visibly shaken, went though the events.
"Mrs Compote-Berry and myself were out for a quiet drive in my vintage Bentley when we stopped at red traffic lights next to The Spotted Cow. All of a sudden the car was surrounded by drunken louts who were screaming abuse and showering the car with beer and various food items. Unfortunately one of the louts managed to open a car window and attacked Mrs Compote-Berry with a crabstick. When the lights changed to amber we drove off as fast as possible."
PC Kettle of Stowmarket Police reported to The Bugle; "The Spotted Cow is very popular with students but we suspect that these attackers may be part of a local anarchist group".
Following the incident the Police are advising elderly businessmen in vintage Bentleys to avoid the area.
Other news from The Bugle:
Stowmarket woman arrested in Thailand.
New refuse collection plan described as "madness".
Seagull attacks pensioner.
Speaking exclusively to The Stowmarket Bugle, Chaz (64), still visibly shaken, went though the events.
"Mrs Compote-Berry and myself were out for a quiet drive in my vintage Bentley when we stopped at red traffic lights next to The Spotted Cow. All of a sudden the car was surrounded by drunken louts who were screaming abuse and showering the car with beer and various food items. Unfortunately one of the louts managed to open a car window and attacked Mrs Compote-Berry with a crabstick. When the lights changed to amber we drove off as fast as possible."
PC Kettle of Stowmarket Police reported to The Bugle; "The Spotted Cow is very popular with students but we suspect that these attackers may be part of a local anarchist group".
Following the incident the Police are advising elderly businessmen in vintage Bentleys to avoid the area.
Other news from The Bugle:
Stowmarket woman arrested in Thailand.
New refuse collection plan described as "madness".
Seagull attacks pensioner.
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